bribery

So lately, I'm all about it.  Last night I convinced myself that if I went to the studio and got out some more orders, I could buy the black lace up boots I'd been wanting.  Later, I talked myself out of ordering my food for the week via peapod (which cost double for the same things I can get myself at Aldi) by promising myself I'd order about 80 dollars worth of tights today, which should last me all winter. Earlier, I made myself go get a bag of cat litter by bribing myself with coffee and a croissant.  Later, if I finish drafting three pieces of ghost landscapes, I can binge watch all the episodes of my trashy tv show favorite.  I plan to clean apartment tomorrow, so who knows what trouble I'll get into.  So it goes...

I am having a hard time prying the lid back open on the manuscript, or maybe more, finding the voice of it, the tenor.  The pieces so far are similar, but I'm still waffling on what exactly is happening.  Usually I just close my eyes and point and whatever direction it goes, I follow.  But this seems reluctant to get out of the gate.  But nothing gets done by blogging.  I am happy to finally have a more portable laptop, which means I can bring it home.  I guess I hadn't realized how much my process has evolved in terms of what is handwritten and what is typed.  I'm heavier on the latter compared to ten years ago or so and more likely to get something to take shape on the screen.