whatever
Some of you may have stumbled across this on Daniela's blog..
Since the usual pattern that I’ve seen with these sort of things (ie anytime anyone dares to disagree or criticize anything that CJ Laity seems to do) typically ends with him twisting you’ve everything said around to suit his own purposes and make himself out to be the victim(SEE COMMENTS BELOW), I initially refrained from responding to his little jab about my weight. It seemed so puerile, so junior high, and, hell, sort of sad and pathetic that all he could think to level at me was a criticism about my appearance. Not to mention sort of ineffective if he intended to be hurtful, since I pretty much got over any sort of body issues in my early twenties, and having decided that, indeed, since I am a girl who likes to eat, to accept my body whatever it’s size, shape, etc. So being overweight, not really an issue for me. So it was pretty laughable to find that that’s what the argument had been reduced to. Really, almost not any more worth of a response than a wild-eyed ranting man on the corner yelling at everyone as they pass by who calls me a bitch because I won’t give him a dollar. What my body weight has to do with poetry or the calendar blog, I just don’t get… And seriously, wow, who knew as a "young overweight woman" I had so much power to put down "the older man"...perhaps I should add that to our mission statement..
He seems somehow to think that there is this vast conspiracy against him, but, really, I have my own distinct reasons for wanting to avoid him (see here and here). Note: his comments have conveniently been deleted, but you can see some of the tone of it if you follow the initial Time Out Chicago Blog link.) Seriously, no one told me he was a bully because I saw it for myself, several times. Numerous times,actually, and with more people than I can count. This imaginary vast conspiracy? I’m sure everyone, no matter which crowd you hang out with in Chicago, probably has something to say about their bad interactions with him. But I tend to form my own opinions about people regardless of what others say. If he wants to continue to think everyone is out to get him, that’s his choice. Mostly I think everyone just tries to ignore him and go about their business. But sometimes, it’s hard to ignore the hatred masked as “news”. My biggest problem with his site, is the negativity he seems to propagate and thrive on, which was my impetus in thinking maybe there was another way, a better less hate filled way to get poetry news out locally. After seeing him rip people apart during that Small Press Month tirade, again and again, I wanted something infinitely less negative, more open to varying view points, to all different little corners of the Chi Po world, which I thought a group blog would do. It’s not really my blog any more than it is anyone else’s on the contributors list, or anyone else who wants to contribute for that matter. An alternative to the maliciousness, the bullshit, the gossip. I sent invitations to join to every single contact in my address book that edited a journal, ran a press, or a litmag, or would have news of some sort, and the people who joined were the ones who responded. His claim on the phrase “chicago poetry” is absolutely ridiculous . What else is one going to a calendar blog that lists readings and such. The Topeka Poetry Daily. ? But it’s what can be expected I suppose from someone who seems to think he has ownership of "chicago poetry". I also don’t get how it seems that I’m copying or stealing from him when the layout and format of the sites are entirely different, the general tone entirely different (we don’t really feel the need to insult the people whose events we are listing, grandstand, or otherwise be a petty and childish.) And believe me, the blog is hardly trying to benefit from his “fame” in fact, I think it would probably like to get as far away that sort of “fame” as possible.
I’m also not sure how I managed to push out other people from the Small Press Showcase, since I had absolutely nothing to do with the planning besides saying “yes” when asked to be a part of it. Did I call him crazy? Yes, apparently I did... I really have no idea whether he actually is, in the rest of his life certifiably insane or not (only those close to him can testify to that. I do not know him well enough to say ) When you are maliciously bashing people at every turn, have delusions of grandeur about being the sole voice and possessor of “chicago poetry”, and spend all your time thinking up ways to rile people up. Yes, that is CRAZY. There is no excuse for it.
Anyhow, I just wanted to chime in my 2 cents and thank all the bloggers that have offered their take on this…There is an interesting discussion in there somewhere on how the female body becomes fodder for discussion in a way that a male’s never does..sadly, I think we’re barking up the wrong tree however if we’re in want of rational discourse with this one..
In the end, he can crack fat jokes till he's blue in the face...the logical solution is to just ignore him til he redirects his rage against the next person on his little list, the next person who disagrees or looks at him funny.
But now that I think about it, the more we talk about it, the more he gets to make an ass of himself in public..so really it's a win/win.
Since the usual pattern that I’ve seen with these sort of things (ie anytime anyone dares to disagree or criticize anything that CJ Laity seems to do) typically ends with him twisting you’ve everything said around to suit his own purposes and make himself out to be the victim(SEE COMMENTS BELOW), I initially refrained from responding to his little jab about my weight. It seemed so puerile, so junior high, and, hell, sort of sad and pathetic that all he could think to level at me was a criticism about my appearance. Not to mention sort of ineffective if he intended to be hurtful, since I pretty much got over any sort of body issues in my early twenties, and having decided that, indeed, since I am a girl who likes to eat, to accept my body whatever it’s size, shape, etc. So being overweight, not really an issue for me. So it was pretty laughable to find that that’s what the argument had been reduced to. Really, almost not any more worth of a response than a wild-eyed ranting man on the corner yelling at everyone as they pass by who calls me a bitch because I won’t give him a dollar. What my body weight has to do with poetry or the calendar blog, I just don’t get… And seriously, wow, who knew as a "young overweight woman" I had so much power to put down "the older man"...perhaps I should add that to our mission statement..
He seems somehow to think that there is this vast conspiracy against him, but, really, I have my own distinct reasons for wanting to avoid him (see here and here). Note: his comments have conveniently been deleted, but you can see some of the tone of it if you follow the initial Time Out Chicago Blog link.) Seriously, no one told me he was a bully because I saw it for myself, several times. Numerous times,actually, and with more people than I can count. This imaginary vast conspiracy? I’m sure everyone, no matter which crowd you hang out with in Chicago, probably has something to say about their bad interactions with him. But I tend to form my own opinions about people regardless of what others say. If he wants to continue to think everyone is out to get him, that’s his choice. Mostly I think everyone just tries to ignore him and go about their business. But sometimes, it’s hard to ignore the hatred masked as “news”. My biggest problem with his site, is the negativity he seems to propagate and thrive on, which was my impetus in thinking maybe there was another way, a better less hate filled way to get poetry news out locally. After seeing him rip people apart during that Small Press Month tirade, again and again, I wanted something infinitely less negative, more open to varying view points, to all different little corners of the Chi Po world, which I thought a group blog would do. It’s not really my blog any more than it is anyone else’s on the contributors list, or anyone else who wants to contribute for that matter. An alternative to the maliciousness, the bullshit, the gossip. I sent invitations to join to every single contact in my address book that edited a journal, ran a press, or a litmag, or would have news of some sort, and the people who joined were the ones who responded. His claim on the phrase “chicago poetry” is absolutely ridiculous . What else is one going to a calendar blog that lists readings and such. The Topeka Poetry Daily. ? But it’s what can be expected I suppose from someone who seems to think he has ownership of "chicago poetry". I also don’t get how it seems that I’m copying or stealing from him when the layout and format of the sites are entirely different, the general tone entirely different (we don’t really feel the need to insult the people whose events we are listing, grandstand, or otherwise be a petty and childish.) And believe me, the blog is hardly trying to benefit from his “fame” in fact, I think it would probably like to get as far away that sort of “fame” as possible.
I’m also not sure how I managed to push out other people from the Small Press Showcase, since I had absolutely nothing to do with the planning besides saying “yes” when asked to be a part of it. Did I call him crazy? Yes, apparently I did... I really have no idea whether he actually is, in the rest of his life certifiably insane or not (only those close to him can testify to that. I do not know him well enough to say ) When you are maliciously bashing people at every turn, have delusions of grandeur about being the sole voice and possessor of “chicago poetry”, and spend all your time thinking up ways to rile people up. Yes, that is CRAZY. There is no excuse for it.
Anyhow, I just wanted to chime in my 2 cents and thank all the bloggers that have offered their take on this…There is an interesting discussion in there somewhere on how the female body becomes fodder for discussion in a way that a male’s never does..sadly, I think we’re barking up the wrong tree however if we’re in want of rational discourse with this one..
In the end, he can crack fat jokes till he's blue in the face...the logical solution is to just ignore him til he redirects his rage against the next person on his little list, the next person who disagrees or looks at him funny.
But now that I think about it, the more we talk about it, the more he gets to make an ass of himself in public..so really it's a win/win.
Comments
In your explanation of your Chicago Poetry Calendar site, you note, importantly, that there are MANY poetry scenes in Chicago. Of course there are -- it's the third largest city in the country! -- but CJ doesn't seem to see this, and is treating "Chicago Poetry" as some kind of monolith.
So, I want to thank you, in the midst of all this, for caring about communities instead of claiming ownership over them!
So sorry you have to deal with this. We all know the fantastic work you do for Chicago and U.S. poetry.
FUCK YOU CJ! LEAVE MY SISTER ALONE!
And your "poetry" sucks too.
Your mindfulness in the face of CJ's rampage is deeply appreciated and admired. The implications of his behavior are not encouraging but you have certainly put him in perspective!
Um, where was I? Right, CJ just seems to be a tool. Dealing with tools is no fun at all, and I'm sorry you've had to waste so much time dealing with that one.
Fair is fair!
Obviously I was wrong...you're not crazy at all...
Dancing Girl Press and all of your effort in literature in art seem valiant. I've been reading your blog for quite some time and it has inspired me to believe that I can start a micro press here in Canada.
I feel sorry for this guy - too bad he's too uninformed to know that a blog name is not a domain name and that when artists co-operate and support each other everyone wins. Wow, to think of all the poetry he's not writing expending all of that hateful energy.
Ultimately, you get what you give right?
Take care Kristy. Good for you for sticking up for yourself.
Our wish (as Chicago poets and Chicago citizens) is that whoever is running the particular domain do a good job of it. (Although it is entirely possible that someone from Timbuktu can register a Chicago Poetry domain and start publishing say porn on it, and really there is nothing anybody can do about it.)
Though, sadly, the conduct of the people running the show (at both ends, CJ original remark, and the needless reaction, when it just as easily could have, should have been ignored) does not fill the community with any great degree of confidence.
I will say this CJ runs a valuable site (to find out about Chicago Poetry events). And the second site now, is only a valuable addition to that purpose.