notes & things | 10/27/2020


It's a Tuesday that feels like a Thursday. The past few days have been a dip in my mood and a desire to sleep all the time, which has also left me with an achy back and a feeling like there's just a lot of emotional icky boiling just under the surface. I thought a news fast might be in order after yesterday--since cases continue to climb, we just elected a Handmaid's Tale villain to the Supreme Court, the election is next week, and I've already done as much as I can (the covid precautions I've been doing all along and continue to do, voting, etc.) and can only wait it out at this point. But, it's hard when part of my job (and even my creative endeavors) involves social media to, you know, stay away from it. So I get sucked back into doomscrolling. And then the news in general. And then also the attendant anxiety and mood swinginess. I am extra cagey around this time of year anyway, what with the anniversary of my mother's death and a lack of daylight. It is not making for a good combination. 

It's Tuesday, and I'm trying to find a center to weather out the storm--new writing projects I'll be starting next week.  Some artmaking endeavors planned for the weekend. An invitation to send some video poem exploits to a journal. Beginning to send out some work from the plague letters.  I keep amassing books in my to-read pile hoping that I'll have the concentration for again and this may be part of the problem.  I need more reading, less doomscrolling. Meanwhile, I watch a lot van-life and cabin renovation videos on Youtube and dream about running away from everything to live in the woods. 

It's Tuesday, and I spent last night debating whether or not it's worth assembling a costume to wear to work on Friday. I wound up ordering a cute headband that's very witch of the wood to pair with a black dress. Hardly anyone is actually around the library, but I will be hosting a horror movie trivia event on zoom that afternoon.  Over the weekend, I plan to get some junky food and candy and queue up a whole bunch of horror movies, my usual Halloween routine. Maybe some cocktails and other amusements Saturday for our usual Saturday stay-at-home date night.  

It's Tuesday, and hopefully by next week, we'll have a general idea, though not definitive, if the best case scenario has happened or the worst. 

Otherwise, all we can do is wait it out. 


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