Thursday, February 23, 2012

sunny side up...

Another week in which I have had my shoulder to the wheel in terms of production, a shoulder that is now a little sore from stapling and trimming and ready to rest a little over the weekend before starting up again on Monday. Since everyone has been getting sick around me, I am trying to get enough sleep, though, which helps keep me relatively calm and non-homicidal. Today, though, I was laying in bed and dreading getting out of it, clamoring from under the covers and into shower, getting dressed, communiting downtown. Just like yesterday. Just like tomorrow. It put me in a bit of a funk, which I had to vanquish by thinking of the good side of each action. Yes, the bed is warm & cozy, but the shower is hotter and filled with yummy bath products. Yes, getting dressed is tedious but I love my closet and my clothes (or most of them). Yes, it's a 45 minute commute, but I can read or plan things out in my head before I get into the thick of things, and if I'm lucky, I'll get a nice view of the lake (I sorta did, but it was all hazy so you couldn't see much).

I was actually in a pretty good mood by the time I got downtown, and even in the studio, with half assembled books piled all over the floor, paper trimmings strewn from one wall to another, and the sneaking suspicion that I may never get everything done in time, I convinced myself how awesome it was to get to do this everyday (not all day, since I had to be in the library at 6, I've been taking half days as comp for my weekend shifts this week). But to make things, and publish awesome work, and have this endeavor and this amazing space which allows me to indulge all my creative whims. I know this all sounds rather Pollyana-ish and not at all like my usual snarky attitude, but sometimes I feel downright giddy lately with a side of optimistic. (Actually, in person I am usually a pretty positive person, with occasional moments of angry, impatient outbursts, that burn hot then go out just as quickly. I am also sort of sarcastic, so what people might interpret as snarkiness is usually just me being a smart-ass.)