I've had a weird relationship with writing from the beginning, since it has always felt like something that doesn't necessarily fit into my "real life"--there is "poetry life" where book contracts and rejections have weight, and then there is "real life" (work,family, my personal life) where those things all seem really small and insignificant compared to the things you do to live, to survive. To be honest, people around me have gone through some serious shit (illness, job loss, legal battles) and all my little poetry woes and triumphs seem so unimportant alot of the time when seen in the big picture. Or maybe it's that the poems still feel like they're important to me personally, the writing itself, but the writing world is less so. And it's not that I've lost pleasure in them necessarily, but more that I've stopped needing for them to be so woefully important. Poetry and the things you do to get poetry out there should be fun, not angst ridden. Or maybe I've just mellowed as I've gotten older.